Despite certain parts of the day, I felt completely not like myself. I felt completely down and overwhelmed by so many things I wasn't expecting to be overwhelmed with today.

School is raining down hard, right now. I'm working harder and studying more than I have probably in three years. Perhaps I am working myself to death. I don't know how people have time to sleep. I don't. If I sleep, I sacrifice something I should be doing. It wasn't always like this, was it? It get's easier, right? Please someone, tell me yes.

I used to be able to stay awake.

I can't stand sitting in class everyday and thinking the thoughts that I do. Am I so easy to forget? To throw away? Why does it even matter anymore...I hate that I miss some things, so very very much, even though I am so invisible. I hate being so invisible; this is perhaps what makes me the saddest.

I've given in to never understanding some things, but I don't know why I still think about them.
My mind is too stubborn to forget, and so is my heart, and perhaps therein lies the problem.

I can't really concentrate on school work right now, so I guess I will just go to bed, so I can go to another long day of class tomorrow. Please, leave me love. I need it very badly right now. Goodnight...

Dear God, please send me something to make me laugh.....