hmmm.... can't sleep. maybe cause i dreamt last night, and i havent dreamt in forever, or maybe cause i know what i need to do with my life but don't want to know at the same time. maybe cause i just drank two diet cokes. in any case, i am awake, and writing.

mostly i am awake cause i have to make a promise to someone who doesn't read this, doesnt even know that this blog exists, and wouldnt know how to find it if they did.... i promise to them that there will be a day when they wont have to call me crying. that i will fix things for them, i will make things better for them. if there is one thing i will do in my life, i will do my utmost best to give them a peace they have not had in years and years. i will stop their crying. i give my word on that. i will do all that my little body allows me to do, in order to smooth the road which life has so unjustly delt to them. oh lord, how dare i say that they suffer some injustice... can i really say that without saying that God's plan is flawed, for i know His plan is perfect. I just pray that the promise i made is part of His plan, because I cannot imagine living my own life without this promise.

Maybe now that I have written this thought down and made it real, i can sleep. Goodnight. If only i could give that peace tonight......