While unpacking, I just found my box of photos and have been posting them up all over my new room. It's so odd to have all these old memories surrounding such a new environment. It's sad actually, and also promising. Some of these people I will never see again, and there are also new people that will soon cover my walls. I miss the old ones. I even somehow miss the new ones. I am unable to sit still right now, so ready to start this year. So many things will be different, and although it will be very difficult, I know I am doing the right thing. Today I really feel like I am on the right road, following everything I've ever wanted.

I wonder what I will say about this year in retrospect. Will I have been naive? Will I have been inspired? I don't know where my memories will be, or with whom. But I thank God for all the people I just put up on my wall. I've been alone in the house all week, and I have had so much time to think. I wrote, but for myself. I haven't found the words to post on here so far. Actually, it's just been an introspective week: peaceful and quiet and small and bright. Moving has been cathartic. I feel clean. That's what this next year should be: clean, pure, simple, and absolutely the brightest year I've ever had. I am following the path that's been waiting for me all of my life, how could this year be anything but what it should be?

I've been thinking about the idea of karma lately. I think people get what they put out into the world. I truly believe that. I think if you love, you will receive that back somehow. I think if you hate, you will receive that as well. This thought has put a different perspective on my actions lately. Maybe this is me growing up. Or better yet, returning to the rights and wrongs of childhood. But in order to be the best person I can be right now, I absolutely must believe this in some form. Because I know I have much more to give than I am giving right now. And that's what this year will be about.

Round and round
carousel
has it got you under it's spell?
moving so fast
but going nowhere

Up and down,
ferris wheel,
tell me how does it feel
to be so high...
looking down here...

Is it lonely?
Lonely
Lonely

Did the clown
make you smile?
He was only your fool
for a while,
And left you wandering there.

Is it lonely?
Lonely
Lonely

~Norah Jones, Carnival Town