Well, look. I don't feel like a good person right now, no matter how hard i am trying. But i AM trying, and that's the thing. I am not perfect, I am not. No one is. But for goodness sake, those of you who know me know how much I hate to see people hurting. Hate it. Loathe it. Will do anything in my ability to prevent it. And right now I am sucking at it. I am trying so hard to do what is right. But there are some things I can't help or prevent. For that I apologize, but please don't judge me on that. If you know me, then you would know that I am a good person. No one out there knows what is going on with me right now, because I haven't told anyone. So because you don't know, trust that I am doing what I can, and don't assume that I don't know what's going on. I have never done anything half-heartedly, and i don't give up on my friends for anything. anything. so please, do not judge me if you do not know me. i try my hardest to give everyone that much respect, and i deserve the same.

why do i even write on here anymore? i should delete it... for i can't say the things i need to say. not clearly at least. not without being misunderstood. i am a happy person. but there are times when all people have problems, and now is one of my times. i don't need advice, i don't need questions... i simply need my friends' love. i need that just like i always have... i need my best friends like i always have, and i wish the rest of the world wouldn't judge me for the things they don't know. maybe right now i have nothing to give back to the world, and i apologize for that, but i always do my best to be fair and honest and loving to everyone. i'm serious... if you know me, then you know that. but it breaks my heart that sometimes people can't see that.

right now, i simply am just sad (do not assume the reason), and i apologize, but it happens, and i will be fine. it is no one's fault, and again, you may think you know what all these words are about, but i promise not one of you does. i am a much more private person than you think. there are things between only God and me. Things that will stay that way forever. So please, I am just asking you for the respect I give all of you... dont judge me, please.. for there are things in my life right now that I cannot explain. I suppose I write on here for a release, and I am sorry that these entries have caused assumptions.

But this too shall pass....