Ok, I need verification. ARE THESE RULES TRUE??!?!?!?!?!?! I knew you people had some sort of secret club or something.
Also, nice job tonight B. Nothing says "man" like a piccolo trumpet. No but seriously, nice job.
~~~~~~~~~The Man Code~~~~~~~~~~
1. No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man. (in fact, even remembering your best friends birthday is optional)
2. Women who claim they "love to watch sports" must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the ability to pick a Buffalo wing clean.
3. If a mans zipper is down, that’s his problem, you didn’t see anything!
4. You must offer heartfelt condolences over the death of a girlfriends cat, even if it was you who secretly set it on fire and threw it into a ceiling fan.
5. While your girlfriend must bond with your buddies girlfriends with in 30 minutes of meeting them, you are not required to make nice with her gal pal's boyfriends- low level sports bonding is all the law requires.
6. Unless you have a lucrative endorsement contract, do not appear in public wearing more than one Nike swoosh.
7. When stumbling upon other guys watching a sporting event, you may always ask the score of the game in progress, but you may never ask who's playing.
8. If your girlfriend asks to set your friend up with her ugly, whiny, loser friend of hers, you must grant permission, but only if you have ample time to warn your friend to prepare his excuse about joining the priesthood.
9. Only in a situation of mortal danger or ass peril are you permitted to kick another member of the male species in the testicles
10. Unless you're in prison, never fight naked. This includes men who aren't wearing shirts.
with every set of laws, there are appropriate punishments. If any man shall happen to break any one of these codes, he will be found guilty, and will, for 24 hours from the time of the violation, be considered NOT A MAN. During this time he will not be referred to in any masculine way, and he shall bear the name Princess.
4 Comments:
okay, who's the one who leaked this to molly? i mean, seriously, she's alright but these rules could be seen by ANYONE.
these are the basics. i have the complete handbook, which you can see for a nominal charge and a pinky-swear oath of silence.
oh, and thanks. i do alright with my little toy trumpet sometimes.
-B
'bout right. Each niche has it's own subtle variations to the laws, so you have to be wary. Sometimes, in certain situations, the prettiest princess is a joke, and you can't call people princess to make them feel bad.
heyyy that was on my wall!
BLEH
I don't know about the Nike law i've never had that problem. I think that's a rule for black people.
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